Dear Aden and Connor: Resiliency

Dear Aden and Connor, resiliency is a super important skill for a happy and successful life. It is very hard and often painful to develop resiliency, but I think it’s the most important characteristic of people that can actually change the world.  If you can keep your heart soft and your mind open to others while, at the same time, sharpening your toughness to face adversity- you can achieve nearing anything.  Practice finding some way to prosper in the face of adversity; it will make you a formable leader, friend, parent, partner and human being. For all our follies, you are born from two very resilient parents. When your father and I met, we knew quickly that we could do anything together.   We have always believed in our superpowers as a couple, because we are confident in our own and each other’s resiliency. That is an awesome feeling to have with your partner.  Seek this feeling with your important partnerships in life.

Your father lost his dad at age 8. He succeeded despite great tragedy early in life. I thrived after surviving severe life-threatening trauma as a very young adult. Early in our relationship, your dad would tell me we could do anything together; and he meant literally anything. I encourage you to marry someone who has great resiliency.  If you seek a partner who self-identifies as a victim and feels the world and life is always against them, you might waste a lot of precious time and energy. You will be a lifelong caretaker; don’t fall for this even if it makes you feel needed and wanted. You are needed and wanted without this feeling, I assure you.  My desire for you is to marry a superhero; someone who makes you better, stronger and smarter. This person should be loving and caring, don’t misinterpret me here on that. But also know that I desire someone for you who can stand tall by your side when life gets rough- because life gets rough on everyone at some point. Be resilient and seek a resilient mate. Your potential together will be limitless; your children will prosper; your life will be a wild adventure.

2 thoughts on “Dear Aden and Connor: Resiliency

  1. My heart is full…. as your friend who has been there through divorce, marriage, children, career, etc. I share that bond with no one else. You have always amazed me and always will. You really are not human as reading your eloquent post reminds me. I can say resolutely Nicole that you, my dear friend, are truly one in a billion. May we all aspire to be a little more like you. The world will a better place.

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